(Each section is by a different group member)
The love, safety, tenderness, and gentleness expressed in this group is incredible.|
The group has helped me grow. It has protected me big time. It has been my lifeline. There are times that I have nearly given in to self-harm, but did not because of the support of the group.
My therapist has often said I need to be careful about who I choose to share with. People can mean well but if they donít have the knowledge or are unwilling to understand, the result can be harmful. But with this group I have found safety and acceptance. For this group, I will be forever grateful.
I think it is somewhat miraculous that I and my parts have been able to trust everyone in this group. I never get close to people. Yet this group is the family I always wanted and never had.
ďNothing makes us so lonely as our secrets.Ē When I read that, I thought immediately of our group. As I see each of us opening up and revealing our secrets, Iím witnessing something that is more beautiful than I can put into words. And as each alter comes forth and shares the secrets, be they past pain, insecurities, or concerns, or real or imagined guilt, we become less and less lonely.
Immediately before joining the group, my terror was knowing that because nothing worked, I may as well go ahead and die right now. When first visiting the Net-Burst.Net website, I thought making contact would be useless because Iíd be charged a fortune and I canít afford anything right now. Eventually I felt so desperate that I decided I could at least make enquiries. To my amazed relief I discovered that everything is free.
The group is helping so much that my life changed from the moment I received my first email. Somehow I sensed that this was going to be the beginning of the end of a horrible nightmare. And it has. Even the worst of days since this group took me in has been a walk in the park compared to the best days before.
Despite the process being initially frightening, it is somewhat phenomenal how sharing what has been buried deep for so many years brings about such profound results. I and my alters are no longer the only ones with my concerns. We have invited caring people who really understand to be present with us in our traumas and our anxious thoughts. We really and truly are no longer alone.
I have never, ever, ever, ever felt as safe as I do here in this group. I have not had even the slightest feeling of regret for being here. It is truly amazing that we have come together in such a strong, cohesive group.
I am so thrilled to have the blessings of friendship with people in this group. I donít know if you have even a hint of what that means to me. Iím not totally sure why Iím even saying all these things. I am rarely able to express feelings of appreciation to others. I am just so thankful for the wonderful friendships I have found here.
As a child I would create families in my imagination every day Ė hundreds of them Ė that would come and rescue me from the rubble of my horror. This group has been far better than anything that I was able to imagine as a child. And I know that the group has saved my life, literally!
I was seeing a counselor before discovering this group and I still see him on a regular basis. But that has become a very small part of my recovery. I have read books about abuse issues, post traumatic stress syndrome, and DID. And while that has been informative, it could not and didnít help me personally. I needed to have real people who were dealing with the same things I was that would understand me and be there for me, all of me (alters included). And that is what group has done.
This healing journey has not been without its ups and downs. There have been some excruciating things I have had to deal with. But having all of the group there for me has given me the ability to deal with those hard times.
I could share lots more, but donít want to be too longwinded. For now, know this: the before and after pictures of my life since finding the group reveal a night and day difference in how I live.
I am so thankful to the group! I love everyone in it very dearly and long for the day that we meet face to face so I can give them the physical embrace that I can only extend in cyber space right now.
I asked Jesus for a hug yesterday and he has been giving it to me through the group.
Proverbs talks about the power of the tongue. It has power to heal, or tear down and destroy. We who have been injured so deeply, understand that power greatly and see the far-reaching effects of it in our life, and attitudes toward ourselves, God, and others.
The last few days the words that have been spoken to me through the group have been reaching deep inside and countering the horrible lies that have been instilled in me. I can hear the positive words from the group going over in my mind, and I hear some of my alters giggling with delight. It is like I can feel it gently massaging my heart and restoring life that was lost.
It has taken me a very long time to get here, but the rewards are well worth the walk through the darkness to get here. My Papa (God) gave me a promise that he will give me the treasures that are hidden in darkness Ė the place where no one wants to walk because it is filled with deep trials, pain and grief at times Ė yet the treasures that we unearth there are richer than anything found on the sunny side of the mountain.
I praise God for my trials. They are working in me to produce those fruits of the Spirit that cannot be bought. My faith is much more valued by my Papa than gold or silver.
When I pray about this group, I have a sense that our Daddy will use it for his glory, and that many lives will be touched, including our own. I am looking forward to seeing the God who tenderly made butterflies and bees and yet has power over the storms, work miracles in our lives though this group and in the lives of those he will send to us to minister his love, truth and kindness to.
This group is very special. It is an amazing community of insight, wisdom, compassion and humor.
Joining this group was my last hope. I had purchased supplies to commit suicide and had a plan of where and when to complete it. I didnít tell anyone, but the date I had set to commit suicide was just three days after I joined the group. That date came and went because of the hope and love this group gave me. So many in the group send me lifesavers. The prayers, care, compassion, and kindness I keep receiving from the group is ďoff the charts,Ē and full of the true meaning of what God is really all about.
I have spent thousands of dollars on self-help books, been to several psychiatrists and psychologists, and even spent a couple of months in a mental hospital. None of it has ever provided long-lasting, true healing. To add insult to injury, I am a Christian, and I felt like a complete failure in my faith because I wasnít all Kum-Ba-Ya inside. Oh, I have a smile on the outside (Iím a master of masks) and people at church believe Iím such a happy person. Inside, I was dying a slow, painful death.
Iíve been a member of this group only for a few weeks, but I have already taken my original planned suicide date off my calendar.
When I didnít have any hope, this group has already given me some. Everyone here is so supportive. So many in it have experienced abuse similar to my own and they are healing. I already know that they all care about me. I donít know where this is all going to go, but Iím staying, and Iím inspired to fight for my healing. I believe the Lord is providing me with the help I need, in a great part, by participating in this group.
Iím inspired by everyoneís determination and courage to heal, and how brave they are to write and express what they are going through.
I do believe there is true healing, and that in this group we will continue to see proof of it.
I may not be able to write very often. I have been on vacation, and must return to work tomorrow, which requires about 50 hours a week of my time. But, I will come to visit it and contribute as often as I can. It is a great opportunity!
Iím amazed at what this group is doing in peopleís lives. I didnít think I would ever make such a great difference in someoneís life or be a part of a group that did.
Meeting everyone I have met so far in this group is the miracle Iíve been begging for all of my life. Iíve been to one head doctor after another but not one of them ever suggested group therapy. I canít believe that in such a short time that I have been sharing with this group how much lighter I feel. I feel like Iím actually floating on a cloud of love and hope. I have never felt this much hope, ever! It feels good to know that I am not alone.
Before I joined this group I was wanting to die. I long ago gave up on God. So I donít know why I chose this group, other than itís a miracle. I went from one thing to another, trying to find help. Most of the things I did were constructive but it wasnít helping Ė because I was doing it alone. With this group, I feel like part of a real family. That is something I have longed for all my life. I feel nurtured and loved with this group. I love everyone in it. I feel so much better. I feel safe to be myself and that has taken such a load off me. I have a group of people I can trust! I am so thankful for being a part of this group.
Remember: if you are certain that these people could not possibly accept you, then we are particularly keen that you join us. Each of the above people know from long, bitter years what it is like to hate oneself and feel isolated and not understood. If you have Dissociative Identity Disorder and you think yourself unlovable, be assured that we relish a challenge!