Knowing greatly encouraged I would have been, had I been treated like I was treating her, I was mystified by her reaction. Not wanting to offend her, I toned it down. There was nothing superficial about my encouragement, however. It was not flattery, but an almost uncontrollable expression of my heart. Over the years, finding things worthy of praise in people has gradually become part of my personality. And there is much to admire in someone who is suffering severely and yet still holding on like this woman. So although I tried to keep it down, praise for her kept bobbing to the surface in my e-mails.
This sister later found this exact part of my webpage. She e-mailed me, quoted this section, and commented:
This worked well with me, too, even though there were times I almost "hated"
you for what you said because I did not want to believe I was doing something
right. I was trying to convince myself that I was worthless and should kill
myself. Your patience and consistent, loving response got through to me.
I was providing e-mail support to a precious sister in the Lord. At one point I found her objecting strongly to my attempt to practice what I’ve just mentioned, namely to commend and encourage someone whenever that person takes a tiny step in the right direction.